It’s Too Hot To Larp

20 July 2010 — I was talking with a friend about Comic Con and she asked if I was going to larp this year. I replied, “It’s too hot to larp.” Every year at Con, I am fascinated that people actually do larp on the concrete out in the blazing sun. Because, baby, it is too hot to larp. So I wrote this from the perspective of a guy who’s traveled all the way to Comic Con only to decide he’d rather stay inside.

I recorded this for the It’s Called A Secret Attack! record.


I know we came all this way
and we had some trouble with the TSA
getting my broadsword declared a medical device

Baby, it’s too hot to larp
I’d rather stay here in the dark
and watch the peasants get overwhelmed in the San Diego sun

There’s no guild here to test out mettle
and no scores we have to settle
and today we don’t have to stuff our tunics with ice

Cause, baby, it’s too hot to larp
I’d rather cool off in the dark
and watch the amateurs get pwned by the San Diego sun

I know you’re just looking out for me
but I’m the same paladin I’ll always be
I just think a weekend might be great
without the battle axes and armor plates

Baby, it’s too hot to larp
just take a look at Darth
he’s got his helmet off and he dreams of Hoth
in the San Diego sun